I ended up at America's Best Contacts & Eyeglasses, where they advertise a free eye exam with 2 pairs of complete glasses for $69.95 with single vision plastic lenses. That sounds like a great deal, but magically, my actual cost would have been over $200!!! How is that possible?
Well, first off, if you want an eye exam for both glasses and contacts, it's not free. By itself, an eye exam for glasses is $45. An eye exam for contacts is $69. You might expect that they'd just add the difference of $24 if you're buying glasses and also getting a contact exam, but you'd be wrong. You also might expect that "complete glasses with single vision plastic lenses" would actually include single vision plastic lenses, but you'd be wrong again. That's just for the frames.
I decided to take my eyeglass purchase elsewhere, and to just pay for the $69 contact exam. Except, they tried to charge me $99!!! What the hell? Well, the optometrist recommended that I have my eyes dilated. She failed to mention that this was an additional $30. I protested, and they agreed to charge me only $15, the cost of the visual field exam. I had already declined the visual field exam.
Like a car salesman pushing a rust protection package, the technician rattled off a bunch of fine print before the visual field exam. When I asker her to repeat everything, I realized it was an extra $15. After declining, she presented me with a refusal form. The form described the benefits of the visual field exam, but it also indicated that I was not in the demographic that really needs the visual field exam. Furthermore, there was no reason this form couldn't have been included with all the other forms I filled out in advance, except they were trying to scam me.
When I went back for the follow up for my contacts, the optometrist sent me to the front desk to "order my contacts". When I told the clerk that I wasn't going to order contacts, but wanted my prescription, she had to go back to the optometrist to get it. The optometrist was going to keep it on file at their office without giving me a copy of my prescription. I know this is standard procedure at these places, but it still disappoints me that so-called medical professionals are willing to whore themselves out for the big-box eyeglass pimps.
The upside of this whole experience was that I got online and started searching for alternatives. That's how I found glassyeyes and Zenni optical. It turns out that most of the big players in the eyeglass business are owned by the same monopoly. If you're tired of getting screwed over by them, try ordering eyeglasses online. I ended up getting a pair of prescription sunglasses and a pair of prescription glasses with polycarbonate lenses shipped to my door for a total of $51!!! I had my doubts, but they provided excellent communication, including a tracking number when the glasses shipped. I couldn't be happier. Stick it to the man.